The being of Having Sex/Making Love Whatever.....

[Phantom]

I am a fucked up individual.

Anything that I post that has contradictions with I have said at any other time, please refer to the first sentence.

Basically, thread is just to talk/share my thoughts and feelings regarding sex. Participation is welcome.

I am a male, I have needs. I pay to have those needs fulfilled, nothing wrong there. Only problem is that it is just not as fulfilling as making love.

Paid Sex. She comes, she services you, gives you a good or bad time. Time is up, you pay her. Till the next session.

Making love. She comes, you put your arms around her, kisses her on the lips, tell her how much you miss her and how much you want her. She lets you do things to her that she would not let anyone else do even for a million dollars. And you are the only one in the world she will allow to. And you savour her body, her kisses, her willingness to please you, your gladness that she is yours and yours alone. And you just keep needing her, wanting her and she feels your need and does all that you want to fulfill it. That for me is making love. There is more, but these will suffice.

I wish I could make love with someone again. Having sex releases the urge but does not do anything to quench the emotional, mental and other parts of me. But I tire of the commitments, I need to be able to do what I want, when I want, without any restrictions. Fuck me, not really, I messed up bad and lost a girl few years back and I went hell free on paid sex. I got too fucking jaded to go after anything else again. True, I do not want to deal with the commitments that comes with a relationship anymore, I am too tired, too antipathic to deal with those anymore.

Bah, how I got to be how I am is not important. Everyone messes up relationships, I just have a exceptional talent for messing it up big time.

And back to sex related stuff.

Stepping into the paid sex scene, sometimes you unwittingly hope to recreate the feel of making love. I have had FOC sex before with commercial girls, it was good but I think I somehow fucked those up too. Don't exactly remember how. Anyways, not exactly going to go to the lengths and be serious. But the fucking commitments, the duty to care for her, meh..... if you all get what I mean.

As I try to go for the feel of making love, I keep going for paid sex to look for it, simply cause I am too fucked up to involve myself in another relationship. And it is not there, not even a pale shadow of it cause at the back of your mind you know better. But if a heroin addict can't get himself any heroin, he'll settle for anything else, as I do. I do not want to be in another relationship but still I need to make love and........repeat this paragraph.

Yeah......I am a fucked up individual.

P/S : I am not depressed, just musing on the irony of my mindset and sharing it out.

[orneryjoe]

Interesting post.

It's true that commercial sex and making love with one's significant other is not the same. But I think you do realise as well, that neither is perfect. In fact, nothing in life is perfect. So instead of longing what one cannot have, I am resolved to enjoy what I can have.

Thus like you, I am almost totally into commercial sex now. Unlike you however, I savor every encounter. Every one is different, unique and satisfying in its own way. Of course with a few, it totally sucks, but thankfully, with some experience, one learns to avoid the lemons.

If I were to live my life over again, I would never commit long term. Even with the most delectable of babes, after some time, that longing for variety will re-assert itself. Humans are a non-monogamous species. Wish I had discovered this fact earlier on in life.

The truth of our non-monogamous nature ought to be taught to all young people as this will have a profound impact on their long term happiness.

[tigonboy]

Thanks for sharing.

[callmebad]

After breaking up with a girl, naturally you have this jaded feeling.
You just need time to cool off before you decide on the next move.
Commercial sex and non-commercial ones can never be the same.
Commercial ones are very mechanical, same motion, same procedure,
probably trying to fake some orgasms to make you feel good.
After you release, you have this empty feeling, unlike when having sex
with gf.

[jnudes]

Sometimes hearing the neighbor making love can also make you high.

[LovePotion]

When you have sex with someone you love, you feel tired yet bonded.

When you paid for sex, you feel excited and hungry. After the season, you will feel damn lonely or frustrated.

althought you can find some very good paid sex partner to comfort your desire but still you must understand how to protect your feelings.

If not, love someone that you doesnt love to reduce the pain.

[Phantom]

Why Am I So Desperate ???

I got my hands on 2 girls with C boobs today.
1 was only 1.5m tall but boy does she have big boobies for her height and figure of average build.
The other was slim built, average height, and C Boobs too
Always loved big boobs on slim bodies, makes the boobs seem bigger

Back to the sub-title.

I went alone to a KTV Happy Hour today, as I usually do, being the hermit that I am.
I was unknowingly cursing my luck as the time wore on, there was just nothing decent on offer.
I WANTED TO BANG SOMEONE
My last few sessions has been with girls from Dome 1, no communication there, so just wanted to look for a PRC girl that you could talk with and hopefully bang, and as time wore on, prospect seemed bleaker by the minute.
I had a rather fresh "girl" with me, though closer inspection when she sat next to me she was actually quite auntish looking.
Damn the dim lighting in the ktv
She was not ugly, just too auntish looking for my taste.
Being mindful of the time, when the girls who were working that day should have arrived and having visually combed through them and finding none to my liking, I resigned myself and asked her if she would like to "Go Out" with me.
She played coy, saying she did not understand, I further explained subtly to her. She went for the Power Up Blur Level and still did not understand. I Powered Down my desperation and shed my armour, end of story, ain't going to be playing How's Your Pussy ? with someone whom I would not give a second glance on the streets if not for my damn hormones/horniness/desperation to bang. Nonetheless, I did also make a move on her boobs too, and felt her nipples to be the outward pointing type. Nothing wrong with those type of boobs, just not in my Happy Meal Menu. Small blessings there.

I think I must have asked her after the 1.5m C boobs girl rejected me, hardly possible I asked the last choice first. After the 1.5m girl said she did not do any ECAs, i just heck it and went for her boobs. MaMaMia, damn she has full boobs for someone of such petite stature....!
Another girl was receptive, but tomorrow, not today.
But I was going on the - I want to BANG. Now NOw NOW !!!! Mode.
She went into the KIV mental note.
Lo and behold, the slim C Cup appeared

After so many times where boobs looked big from outside only to disappear when the bra is taken off, she was a pleasant surprise when I saw her boobs in flesh. At the KTV, she looked just only average sized to me. Her looks and figure appealed to me, being slim and long hair. She may not be among the best I have seen but I was definitely interested. So even tho she came late, 3 hours after the Happy Hour session started, I still took her, with less than 2 hours to go before the session ended.

Buggers, too much useless details, but since it has already been written, I'll try to be for strait forward.

TCSS, some smooth moves and words later, we agreed to go for a 2 bongs session. Price was not my proudest achievement but I wasn't exactly swimming in an ocean of options.

In the room.

Slim Fair Body.........Nice.
DAMN, C Boobs and Perky Nips......Nice those babies were all natural, I had very intense close inspections to verify it
ButterFly tongue on my nips and dickie......Nice
No sucking, says she has ulcer........ -___-"

Blah blah blah, first bong over. Rating : Enjoyable. Can't stop myself from squeezing those firm boobs. Not much in the way of servicing me but thats the way of the KTV girls.

She says she is unwell and unable to do the second shot. I was so ______ . Leave it to you guys to describe such feel.
The price of 1 bong ? $50 less than the agreed price of 2 bongs......

Side Note

I thank the Selection Committee for give me the FuckTard of the Week Award. I totally deserve this as I am truly a fucking retard......

Some other boring and irrelevant stuff later, I discovered she could do the ONE WORD HORSEY !!! Translation : 一字马
It means that she is able to split her legs evenly apart on the floor, the typical thing a gymnast does. I witnessed this with my own eyes.
I was going like, I could have put her on me and spin her around !!
She learnt it from being a dancer, no idea what type of dance she does, but seriously, who cares at that point. You only think about the possiblities that you can do and what other gymnasty looking things she can do and what you can do to her also.
All these stuff do not pertain to the purpose of this post but hey, a guy has to crow a little

Anyways, she was looking for a robert and gave me quite a few not so subtle hints going that way.

So, here is one kink cause we have a tentative appointment for tomorrow. Do I go in again at 3x the price for a prc FL in SBF and other assorted costs just to see what other positions she can bend herself into or look for greener pastures. I have already gotten 1 fucktard award, not keen for another one though. Furthermore, I do have another number to call on so.....meh, probably not going out with her anymore, simply not worth the money nor hassle just for her.

OK, back to the sub-title.

When I first started on KTVs, I only approached on maybe the 2nd or 3rd trip after sitting with target/s. As time wore on, I became smoother, and broach the topic at near the end of session on the 1st trip.
Now, fuck yall, I just ask - You bang ? No funny jokes, no honeyed word, just that.
And I always get so bloody desperate that QC goes out of the window and I have banged a few that I have no idea why and what the fuck did I did it for.

So, am I the only guy like this or are there any others like me ?

Probable Answer to Why I am so Desperate -

Cause I am a bloody grass for brains horny dumbass.

[cookiemonsta]

something you fail to realise is commercial sex only satisfy your physical urges...
the flavor you are yearning for is the emotional passion from the transaction...
as the saying goes, you can't buy love
some things are meant to be earned, not store bought
sorry mate...

[joncheong]

dear TS.... please do not write yourself off....keep a lookout for girls whom may be your eventual partner....even if you go into a r/s...doesn't mean you need to commit yourself to marriage...but of course you also shouldn't play with the girl's feelings...can remain as bf and gf first and you two can make love for as much as you want...and if the time if right and you two click well...then decide to tie the knot?