Hurting someone who is deeply in love with you

MachoDevilX · #1 09-04-2005, 03:22 AM

I personally find that knowing the fact that we have hurt someone deeply (emotions and feelings) is more hurtful then someone hurt us. Does anyone has the same view as me?

I personally find that I would rather someone to hurt me then I have to hurt someone who loves me deeply. In reality, it is often the case that none of us can have the best of both worlds and we often have to make decisions to disappoint other parties in order to be together with another person.

Any bros have experienced the feeling before, please share your story.
Thanks!

Matthias · #2 09-04-2005, 03:25 AM

food for though. my brain cant function at this hour....i try not to hurt people. although i wld be upset if a girl cries coz of me

MachoDevilX · #3 09-04-2005, 03:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matthias

food for though. my brain cant function at this hour....i try not to hurt people. although i wld be upset if a girl cries coz of me

Bro, Thanks for being the first person to support this thread.

Very often, we have no choice but to make certain decisions to hurt some girls who are deeply in love with us. And the feeling of knowing how hurt they are, is really painful. It is more than the guilty feeling. It's the feeling of having to disappoint someone who treat you so well, and love you with all her heart but then you cannot reciprocate her with the same feelings. In front of you, some of the girls might act as if nothing has happen but then deep in their heart, they feel really painful.... And once their hurtful feelings are triggered, we will then be able to feel their pain... And even more painful in our heart since we know that it was us, who have hurt them.

So, all bros who are thinking of playing around with girls' feelings, please spare a thought for them. If you don't love them, please don't make them feel that you love them. In the end, if you still have feelings as a human being, you will be the one who feels the pain...

traummy · #4 09-04-2005, 03:52 AM

yes...i must confess that i did hurt some people in my life until now...and i believe i am still in this same shit....sigh..and these people i hurt are the people who loves me most....

i hate myself for not able to keep my love to One.... i had been thinking lately...how, when and who i will be hurting if things keep going on like this on me....

my wife(6years) who loves me deeply...my mistress(malaysian) (4years)who madly in loves with me for years....my PA (1year) in Indonesia who loves me innocently.....a divorced teacher (2months) who getting to loves me deeply....a copywriter/editor(KL) (1month) falling for me.......

WHAT THE FARK HAVE I DONE!!!...........i know i am a good analyser..balancer...but........all these women...I asked myself DO I LOVE them...and answer is YES!...........

GarlicBread · #5 09-04-2005, 04:00 AM

bro you're jus another WEI XIAO BAO

traummy · #6 09-04-2005, 04:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GarlicBread

bro you're jus another WEI XIAO BAO

seriously....i wish i live in that century...........

oxilary · #7 09-04-2005, 04:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by traummy

seriously....i wish i live in that century...........

3 qi.. 4 qie arh bro?

#8 09-04-2005, 05:03 AM

last month i bring a girl to thai to do U turn for her passport, stay there 3days together, 2nd night we happening n i fell in luv wif her, after a week i bring another girl to do U turn, same thing happen

I hv a wife(7years) a Son(8years old) now one girl in philippine, another in KL, my wife in singapore, this whole weeks i hang in thai disco, drink untill this hour than come back, 1st day there i hv a thai Gf, 3day later i met another one, today ive found another one. yeaterday recieve call from philippine, they hv a fight in phone(both philippine) today happen 2thai girls came together n get to know about our relationship, fxxk man wat am i doing? Iam not horny type u know? but i really luv them. y? the 2thai girl also fight. Fxxk man, iam very drunk today really dunno wat iam doing

The_Hustler · #9 09-04-2005, 05:26 AM

Dear Siam Bu, ever considered converting to a religon where u can marry and love em all?? Or perhaps go into some sort of Monarchy??

Cant help but to remind u the age old law: Love is selfish.

We can love a thousand, but deep in ur heart...I can affirm u'll ony have one that's worth ur eternal love.

Try a simple test, the old test of mother n wife drown scenario... be serious n picture em all drowning... who will you want back on shore first?

I've been through situations aplenty of such... blossoming affair after one heated sex nite... But I balance and know I can never love em all. I'm porud to put it all behind and fall lovingly back to the arms of my partner/wife of 14 years.

Sex is elementary...everything else is secondary. We can just survive on love alone.

The Hustler

#10 09-04-2005, 05:32 AM

Bro, I understand that, my problem now is because my wife wan a divorce a year back, dunno wat happen no reason also, that y i become drinking everyday. i still luv her very much wish to patch back but no chance, she now treat me very gd but when i call her dear she will scold me ask me to stop it if not she will not talk to me anymore, really dont know wat happen,

oxilary · #11 09-04-2005, 05:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Hustler

Sex is elementary...everything else is secondary. We can just survive on love alone.

nice.. i like that

The_Hustler · #12 09-04-2005, 05:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oxilary

nice.. i like that

Oops...I meant "We 'CANT' survive on sex alone hor....not 'CAN'!!"

Survivor,
The Hustler

The_Hustler · #13 09-04-2005, 05:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Siam_Bu

Bro, I understand that, my problem now is because my wife wan a divorce a year back, dunno wat happen no reason also, that y i become drinking everyday. i still luv her very much wish to patch back but no chance, she now treat me very gd but when i call her dear she will scold me ask me to stop it if not she will not talk to me anymore, really dont know wat happen,

Form my observation, there is still a cure. She still picks up ur call means the least of concern is still there. My guess is she has somewhat 'sixth sensed' into ur other affairs n vices n sure is tired with ur kinda lifestyle - women just have that instinct.

Try consider a 'moment of magic' to spark it back with her - surprise her with ur sincerity over a period of time (wound needs time to heal). They always have a soft spot.... pls lah bro, hate to be aunt agony - but tone it down on the drinking part when u consider her above everything else. Knn, once she's back in ur arms.... learn to wipe after eating lah!

Bad Teachings,
The Hustler

jeronimo · #14 09-04-2005, 10:47 AM

Sr NG MachoDevilX,

Prior to my wedding, I had only a regret in my life - two timing a girl whom I loved and loved me more than me loving her
It sucks mega regrets to know I had caused her grief

MachoDevilX · #15 09-04-2005, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Siam_Bu

Bro, I understand that, my problem now is because my wife wan a divorce a year back, dunno wat happen no reason also, that y i become drinking everyday. i still luv her very much wish to patch back but no chance, she now treat me very gd but when i call her dear she will scold me ask me to stop it if not she will not talk to me anymore, really dont know wat happen,

Bro,

I agree with Bro Hustler.
It can take days for someone to trust you and fall in love with you but if the trust and love is betrayed, it will take years for you to gain back the trust and love. It always require time for someone to gain back the trust which have been lost. Although the ending might not turn out to be what you have expected but then at least you have shown to her that you are really sincere. The outcome is not that important anymore since the process will make both of you understand each other even better.

You should know why your wife wanted to file a divorce with you. Although she may not have said it out but then you yourself know that it's the fact that you have betrayed her trust and love. There is no point for you to go drinking and get drunk everyday. To her, you do that not because you love her but because you love yourself as you doesn't want yourself to think so much... You feel guilty. You feel miserable and wanted to make yourself feel better by drinking and drinking. But have you spare a thought for her? You think that by letting her know that you are drunk everyday because you think of her and really want her to patch back with you, and she will "pity" you and accept you back??? Most probably she won't.

She will only come back to you again when she know that you have changed to be a better person and you have proven to her that you sincerely wanted to be back with her. By drinking and getting drunk will only make her feel that you are "hopeless". I have been through such processes as well and I realise that it is just a way to make ourselves feel better. This is selfish and not a show of sincerity... And somemore you still have a son. If your son are still staying with you, cherish your kid and take good care of him. By taking good care of him and work hard in your current job, it will make her realise that you have changed and is really sincere in wanting her back. I keep my fingers crossed that she will accept you eventually since hard work and sincerity alone doesn't really pay in the end. But then at least both of you can understand each other even better in another perspective. And trust me, she will be touched if you continue to shower her with concern and get back to your own life, as well as taking good care of your son. Although she might not accept you back in the end, but then she will know that you still love her deeply...Be sincere to her and show it to her that you are different now and have changed.

Sincerity and love will touch her heart!