Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person

[alec]

I totally know how this feels. The thought of why not met earlier is just depressing but still mus be responsible to reality...

[kenstud27]

* To those that can relate to my story, tks for the encouragement. As i still see her during the weekday, the emotional strings still run strong. The more i wanna forget the more i think of her.....

Wanted to kept it a surprise, i refused to tell her and led the way holding her hand. We crossed the road from her block and by now she kinda guessed where i am headed.

M: 你可别告诉我这里后面有酒店啊？(don't tell me there is a hotel behind here.)
Me: 哈哈，没有啦。我知道这里后面有个地方，这个时候没什么人的。(haha, no la. I know behind here there is a place, no people at this hour)
M: (slap me on the arm) 你是坏人。(you're bad)
Me:哈哈，但是你喜欢(haha, but you like)

We slowly walked up the steep slope. It was exceptionally quiet. The trees around had some rattling, could be the night animals. We walked for a good 10mins to reach our destination, a very quiet end of the nature walk path and it facing a huge man-made lake. It had a kinda eerie feel to it, being so quiet. I kissed her lips. I then reached down to her tube and fondled her breast. She started to moan, she wanted more and so with a swifr move, i pulled her tube down and she wasn't wearing any bra. Standing behind her, her beast looked absolutely beautiful. I grabbed one with my left hand played with her other nipple with my right. She moved away from my kiss and leaned back against me, holding unto my neck and her right hand reached behind for me. She started to rubbed on my crotch and she felt the nergy building up inside.

M:你是坏人，我现在要你 (you're so bad, i want you now)

My queen had commanded and so i obeyed. I carried her up and went to the bush behind, there was nothing there except the lake and we could see if anyone is approaching. She unzipped my jeans and slowly pulled it.down. She placed her face onto my boxer and reached for the top and pulled it down. Lil bro sprung out with anticipation, she hold unto him and started kissing him on the head. Such a teaser she was. She then engulfed the entire shaft into her mouth, i am of a decent size and length so she had no problem taking in the whole thing. It ws wonderful, magical. She started to increase her speed, i was standing up and grabbed her hair a little and moving my lower half accordingly to her speed, mouth fucking her. It was so exciting, getting a bj in the open like that and i could feel myself coming. So i stopped her, taking a little breather. It wasn't about my own enjoyment, i wanted her to enjoy it as well. I got her to stand up, i slolwy unbuttoned her pants and let it dropped, revealing a pink coloured lace panties. I could feel her heart beat as i made her turned around. She was already half naked by now and i removed the last piece of clothing by pulling her panty down to her ankle. I squatted down and started kissing her buttocks. I turned her around and kissed on her pubic hair around, she not clean shaven but she kept it well trimmed so it wasn't bushy and all. I parted her legs a little and started licking on her clitorus. I know what she likes and i serviced her like a schoolboy licking.on his lollipop. She was wet by now and i couldn't hold it anymore too. I stood up and turned her around qnd entered her, slowly i inserted my shaft in as i didn't wanna injured any of us. With one thrust i went all the way in and she reached behind to grabbed my left arm and let out.a.loud moan. Why is it that anything she do could be.so sexy?? I held her onto her waist and started my thrusting. Back and forth i go, both of us was enjoying the moment and the fact we are doing it in the open just added on to the intensity. She was loving it and i loved it when my woman enjoyed the session. She then suddenly pulled herself out and sat me down. She climbed on me and rode me, she was different that night, a bit more wild. I could feel her speed increasing and i know what that meant. I stopped controlling myself and increased my own actions too. She came first, clamping her legs around so tight and i exploded shortly after. We held unto one another, having that "never wanna let you go" feel. What a way to end 2013 and welcome the new 2014. Of course that night we did it more than once at the park but the most memorable was the way we celebrated.

It was about 4am when we finally got back to her block. For some reason, there was a sense of saddness as the lift goes up to the 17th floor. She was leaning against me on the way up, probably sleepy like hell. Oh how i wished that the lift will never reach its destination so that time can stop here now. But, no such luck. Lift finally arrived, she reluctantly stepped out, giving me a look i never seen before, a sense of lost and saddness. We both knew what was coming but it was inevitable. As she turned to leave, i don't know what came over me, i stepped out to grabbed her and kissed her. She held unto me tightly, knowing why i did what i did.

I reluctantly stopped and looked at her:

Me: 宝贝，我爱你。。。一生一世 (baby, i love you...now and forever)

She said nothing, she wept and nodded her head. But something are more meaningful even unsaid....

*To be continued.......

[weewee23]

Super good writing!!!

[ch33zy]

This is the cruelty of life.. u never know what life will throw at u.. in ur case, it's something good that came at a wrong time..

[prettymannequin]

You got me pouting already hahahah, this is honestly really sad.

[baudhd11]

oh my, what happened next

[kenstud27]

The pain is still fresh and this is one story that you can't possibly share with anyone else. For all the condemnation we get from hyprocrites about sbf, i am so glad i can share my story here with people that understands. I teared even as i wrote down the memories but this tears has to be hidden. No one can ever kniw....will be slow to update the next chapter so pls bear with me.

[babyckh]

Camping for more, bro...up you for your experience..

[superman]

Cant wait for the next installment

[kenstud27]

She said nothing, she wept and nodded her head. But something are more meaningful even unsaid.

We didn't meet up after that day until the next work day. Inside my heart, there was.an unexplained sense of heaviness. When we saw each other, there was a look od saddness in both our eyes. We know that no matter how sweet or how in love we are, what was coming was inevitable. It will happened, but what can i do? I'm married and i have my obligations to my wife. Even if i wanna divorce her, i still need to wait 4 years bcoz of the house. I can't be so selfish and asked M to wait for me. 2nd of Jan, the day went past slowly. We didn't talk much that day and didn't know what to say. The work day ended amd i was able to sent her home. We sat at our usual playground but still nothing was said. Perhaps she was waiting for me to say something but i really couldn't. What a coward! Then she finally broke the peace:

M: 很迟了，你也早点回去休息吧 (its late, you should go back and rest)
Me: 我。。。。我不舍得离开 (i....i can't bear to go)
M: 宝贝，我们都知道这一天要来的。你就别折腾自己了 (baby, we both know that this day will come. You should stop torturing yourself)

I didn't know what to say. I got up from the bench with a never before heaviness. Actually, there was so much i wanted to say but then, what's the point? Would it change the fact that tomorrow she will be someone else wife? If it does anything, it would only make the parting harder. I could be over-dramatized the entire experience:

M: 你别这样，结了婚我还是可以有自己的生活和朋友啊 (don't be like that, after the registeration i can still have my own life and friends)

I just smiled and didn't respond to that. I know her more than she knows herself. Based on the current situation we are in, it's already very hard for us to meet and it will be even worse after they move in together. I sent her to her level and kissed her good night, nothing more. I went back downstairs and instead of leaving immediately like i usually do, i sat at our bench for awhile. As the thought of us parting starts to take its form in my mind, i started to tear. I have never cried for a woman before, come on, wake up! You know the rules of engagement and the kind of relationship you are getting into so snap out of it! All the rational reasonings started to kick in but i just couldn't control myself. The truth was, i found love. I found love in the most unexpected place with the most unexpected person. I didn't want it to end but i have no rights to hang on to her. The feeling was horrible, i kept looking up to the sky, just to prevent more tears coming down. But i had to accept the cold hard truth that afyer tomorrow, no matter how much we are in love, something will change.

I knew what was coming and i absolutely hated it. Her messages started coming in, asking if i was on the cab and how far i was from home. I lied and said that I'm almost home. Reluctantly, i got up and eventually managed to flagged down a cab. The journey back was long and alone, in my mind, images of us together kept running through like cars on the highway i was travelling in. Lights from the street lamps flashes past me as the cab drove, each flash seems like knock on my heart. I was hurting, i was weeping. I knew that i love her but i didn't know i love her that much........

*To be continued.......

[prettymannequin]

Aww bro... /pats

[ch33zy]

Bro, i understand how u feel for this relationship.. really struck right in the heart..

[kenstud27]

Lights from the street lamps flashes past me as the cab drove, each flash seems like knock on my heart. I was hurting, i was weeping. I knew that i love her but i didn't know i love her that much.

3rd Jan, i woke with a headache, perhaps from crying last night. Now i finally know how it feels. I got dressed for work but i know today would be different. I messaged M as usual, trying to act cool and normal. She replied with standard responses. Nothing was said about the event that was to come. I got into office and made myself a cup of coffee as usual. Perhaps its my mind playing trick oj me but the coffee tasted exceptionally bitter that day but i was fine with it. No amount of sugar can lift that aweful bitterness in my heart. As the progresses, i had no mood ro work. We kept exchanging messages, nothing serious, she just kept updating me about what she is doing or where she's at.

1000hrs : she finally got to the saloon to do her hairdo alone. I knew where she was at and i wanted so much to just drop whatever i was doing and run to her. To do what? Stop her? What if she rejects and i would just left an even brokenhearted man. Her bf was 10years her senior but had his own buisness so financially he can support her even if she doesn't work. She admitted to me once that before she met me, she only agreed to marry him bcoz she just wanna settle down due to family pressure and her family all liked him. Seen his photo before, nothing spectacular but most importantly, he treated her very well. Am i going to hurt him and my wife for our sake? I can't be that selfish but yet, this is the woman that i love. Dilemma. I couldn't decide. Eventually, rationale took over and i drop the idea.

1200hrs : she messaged that she was waiting for her ride with her sisters. She said she was feeling awful as she was forcing herself to smile but thinking about me. I tried my best to comfort her but seems like everything i tried saying are crap. I too was feeling awful and wished i could just flew there then and swopped her off her feet. The pain in the heart was piercing pain as i looked at clock.

M: 宝贝，车来了。不能和你短信了。晚上有机会才联络你。 (baby, the car is here so i can't message you anymore. Will try to contact you tonight)
Me: 嗯，我没事，不要担心。宝贝，祝你永远幸福快乐。 (ok, I'm fine don't worry about me. Baby, i wish you forever happiness)

She didn't reply after that. In fact, that was our last message of the day. Her scheduled timing was 1330hrs, as i looked upon my desk clock reaches 1330hrs, i closed my eyes and quietly said to myself: i love you baby, i will always love you no matter what happen.

It was a crazy day, i knew she couldn't messaged me as after the ROM she had reception and some photo taking. I was frantically searching through all the social media for her to update her pictures as we agreed that when she can't message, at least let me see the photos.

1700hrs : finally the first set of photos was posted and she looked absolutely beautiful. Her dress complemented her figure and her makeup just made her even more prettiwr. I saw her smiles and her photos with him, i was devastated, i was burning with jealousy. I should be the one next to her, her smiles should be bcoz of me but it wasn't. I almost went crazy at work. Why do i tortured myaelf like that! God have mercy on me! I got up and left my phone on the desk, went to the toilet and washed my face to calm down. Took a deep breath and finally calmed down. Its ok. Most important was her happiness, sometime there are certain things you can't fake. She really looked happy in those photos. She had to, that was the biggest moment in her life.

I stayed late at work that day, hoping that she would message me to meet up but that message never come......

*To be continued........

[PeteTsang69]

i feel for you ...wont hijack your thread too much ...pls carry on ...but i can SO relate to the stuck dilema you're in

me loveless marriage...sticking it out kids sake ...no sex for years ...she seems happy with that, WTF!

have FB 6years, meet FB after 4 years no-sex, now she wants more, but i can't give more, she knows it, ...need to stay for kids... stay how long? have no idea ... FB wants to wait, feel bad FB waiting, told FB keeping lookout for BF at same time ...

every day my heart gets heavier and heavier, why?

becos i meet someone thru work biz, fell head over heals, so many qualities i admire in a woman, smart, sweet, gentle, do-er type.. went out supper twice only, nothing happened ... most is xmas hug
no more biz contact, months later texted me at midnight she fell hard for a married man but trying to resist, only told one person this - told me ... over weeks kept sending cryptic short messages ...i kept re-reading them ...BINGO, its me she likes ..

declared how i felt too ...then cold ...super short texts ..kept asking to meet up, she say yes, last minute back out ...didn't insist so as not to scare her away ...

then 2 weeks ago zero texts ...was so worried something happened, went to her carpark yesterday ... saw her with another guy, his hand on her back leading away from her car, she also saw me ... heart sank so fast and deep ...

tho its a mystery what really is happening there ...my guess is she don't want to break up a marriage, not knowing its already broken ... going to let her be. if she really feels for me, she will come back ...if not, then never meant to be...

i have to now declare the very cheesy fact that LOVE is most important in life, it brings out the best in us towards our partner, gives us energy to do things ...

let me quote something i read to describe me ..."living dead"

becos i now see i can no longer TOLERATE a LOVELESS marriage
before discovering this LOVE feeling ...i really thought thats life...no-feeling

becos its loveless, i don't like to do things as a family ...
becos its loveless, i don't feel ambitious in work/career, why bother work hard
just coasting on mediocrity ..

but things have changed...
what at change life can be when it is filled with TRUE LOVE
i am going to look till i find it ... and not settlle for anything less !

[kenstud27]

*Tks to all who upped my points, wasn't really looking for points but just wanted to share my story.

For those who related to my story, that's the meaning of my title. Sometime the best things in life always come in the wrong time. But like what i shared through a PM woth a TS that consoled me. If today i had the chance to rewind time and make this decision, and knowing what pains i would suffer, i wouldn't have hestitated to go through it again. I rather find love with the wrong person and have that person once truly loved me than never having that feel. Its kinda stupid i know but life is never fair and its going through something so memorable that makes it worthwhile.

My next chapter will be why this experience was so memorable. Sorry for the late update but need time to gather my thoughts. Thanks once again for all your encouragement.

For those who have lost, stay strong. For those who have found it, don't ever you let go. Love her/him with all your heart bcoz you never know what will happen.