Wife & Sex - going through the motion

[sta1100]

Originally Posted by bernardlee

Agree on the point that wife may be secretly admiring other handsome young men. Wife asked me to backup her photos from her mobile phone. Accidentally, I saw a photo of handsome young punk celerating his birthday with my wife. WTF!

There are so many temptations out there in the office. Who knows that while we are not having sex, she is secretly masturbating thinking of other men.

Hi Bro, might not be it, is your wife with this guy 1-1 ??? on his B'day. as long as your wife are truth to you there is nothing to be worry, if she has something to hide why would she ask you to backup her HP.

[JavX]

Originally Posted by Nokia69

I mentioned my predicament in an earlier post.. No sex before marriage (6yrs), a little sex in the first few months, and thereafter less than 2-3 times a mth. No bj, no touch golden pussy, just fj in missionary or from the back lying down. A slight mention of other position means a quarrel and unhappiness, even when both stark naked

...

Bro, i'm in a similar position. Married with kids to a dead fish wife with limited positions. Till now i dun even know how a bj feels. My position is slightly better, but it is going down the drain. There are other factors like frequent quarrels on daily stuffs tat only make things worse. The only thing tat keeps me going r my kids. I've no idea how long i can last...sigh

[mentosmint]

I'm just wondering, bros here who feels they have dead fish wife.. Does your wife work full time, then return home to cook, wash, clean? And Takes care of your kids too? Do you help out? And how well do you understand your wife? You know when her menses coming?
My hubby is very aware of when my period coming (yes, he does make some mental notes), and he can even tell me which day I will be horny etc.
He does the cooking and most of the cleaning the house, while I do the laundry, washing up after meals, caring for our 2 kids. When I am busy with work, he helps with the kids leaving me free to concentrate on my work n puts the kids to bed.

I probably isn't the best sex partner, but I sure put in my best to have fun together with him. I wanted to practice more Bj on him, but he always spoils my fun.

[JavX]

My wife works full time, but doesn't takes care of the kids much. I do my fair share of the duty.

I feel that its her mentality that makes her a dead fish. She is not willing to explore positions, and usually prefers to lie there in missionary. Its worse after she orgasm. She'll just complain of pain and ask me to hurry up. Sometimes I don't even finish a session as its very turn off when she complains of pain. Sex with her is not fulfilling at all.

[5ag1_Boar]

Originally Posted by mentosmint

...

I probably isn't the best sex partner, but I sure put in my best to have fun together with him. I wanted to practice more Bj on him, but he always spoils my fun.

Your husband is a lucky man. Some of us hubbies (before becoming ex) here do so much, still end up with nothing. Its not whether best lover or not. Its about being willing and participative.

What do you mean that he spoils the fun?

[bernardlee]

Maybe we should not expect too much from our wifes. They are not prostitutes with minimal training in satisfying men. As long as she is willing to have sex, i am already very happy. Maybe dead fish is the most natural display of sex? Probably she is just too shy and moans softly. Maybe she does not want to show you she actually enjoying it. Women are the most amazing creature, you have to spend a lifetime to really understand them.

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by mentosmint

I'm just wondering, bros here who feels they have dead fish wife.. Does your wife work full time, then return home to cook, wash, clean? And Takes care of your kids too? Do you help out? And how well do you understand your wife? You know when her menses coming?
My hubby is very aware of when my period coming (yes, he does make some mental notes), and he can even tell me which day I will be horny etc.
He does the cooking and most of the cleaning the house, while I do the laundry, washing up after meals, caring for our 2 kids. When I am busy with work, he helps with the kids leaving me free to concentrate on my work n puts the kids to bed.

I probably isn't the best sex partner, but I sure put in my best to have fun together with him. I wanted to practice more Bj on him, but he always spoils my fun.

Fyi sis, I am the one that wake up my kid get his breakfast ready send him to school, then come back wake up oc send her to catch train to work then rush off to work myself. After work I am the one that run around buying dinner, fetch her from work. Weekend I clean up the house. She only does the occasional weekend cooking. Granted the laundry she does only on alternate days but only dump all into washing machine, believe me even kid school shoes she also used washing machine to wash clean. And yes I know her mense cycle pattern particularly when her boobs feels sore.

When come to kid studies she takes hands off approach, everything push to me. I just wonder what does it takes to get her going, touch also cannot. Some times not necessary must have sex, there are times i just want both of us to cuddle up hug and kiss like the good old days but like that also cannot. Come to sex, try to fondle, pet, neck, finger also she say don't like. Then how?

[bernardlee]

Frankie is almost a perfect husband.

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by bernardlee

Frankie is almost a perfect husband.

No bro I dun consider myself a perfect hub....but at least i try to do my part...last two days has not been good thou cos we been fighting over this issue...got so piss off told her out rightly she just don't know what a man wants and need..

[Lelo]

Frankie, hate to say this but you better be careful if she eating outside. Is she like that before marriage and kids? I know you for to think for the kids but sometimes you got to think of your own happiness. Do you want to live till 70 and think back you regretted for doing or living what's right for you?

Sometimes not having kids may be the best option.

[JavX]

My situation is similar to Frankiestein, although i'm nowhere as dedicated as he is nor is my situation as nasty as his.

Dead fish is just one of the issue, among other frequent disagreements & quarrels. I also feels tat my wife dunno me at all. She will be better off with someone who has similar mindset as her.

The only thing I liked abt her is when she keeps quiet because I can't click with her anymore. The mindset differences is too huge. Its like u put PAP & WP ppl in the same GRC, then you'll see disagreement day & night.

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by Lelo

Frankie, hate to say this but you better be careful if she eating outside. Is she like that before marriage and kids? I know you for to think for the kids but sometimes you got to think of your own happiness. Do you want to live till 70 and think back you regretted for doing or living what's right for you?

Sometimes not having kids may be the best option.

Bro I been asked this question many times and most of them are actually women who analysed my situation and throw me the same question. But honestly I know her too well what she dare to do and not. I guess I sort of know now I am in the wrong marriage cos when you got to start questioning it not once but many times then you probably know the answer. Like I said before, I painted myself into this corner and after having gone through a previous marriage, I have added several baggages with it...hence I cannot just walk away and leave everything...i can only put it down to karmaric effect of my follies and bite the bullet.......for the time being..

[Wizrd]

Originally Posted by mentosmint

I'm just wondering, bros here who feels they have dead fish wife.. Does your wife work full time, then return home to cook, wash, clean? And Takes care of your kids too? Do you help out? And how well do you understand your wife? You know when her menses coming?
My hubby is very aware of when my period coming (yes, he does make some mental notes), and he can even tell me which day I will be horny etc.
He does the cooking and most of the cleaning the house, while I do the laundry, washing up after meals, caring for our 2 kids. When I am busy with work, he helps with the kids leaving me free to concentrate on my work n puts the kids to bed.

I probably isn't the best sex partner, but I sure put in my best to have fun together with him. I wanted to practice more Bj on him, but he always spoils my fun.

Originally Posted by JavX

My wife works full time, but doesn't takes care of the kids much. I do my fair share of the duty.

I feel that its her mentality that makes her a dead fish. She is not willing to explore positions, and usually prefers to lie there in missionary. Its worse after she orgasm. She'll just complain of pain and ask me to hurry up. Sometimes I don't even finish a session as its very turn off when she complains of pain. Sex with her is not fulfilling at all.

Originally Posted by bernardlee

Maybe we should not expect too much from our wifes. They are not prostitutes with minimal training in satisfying men. As long as she is willing to have sex, i am already very happy. Maybe dead fish is the most natural display of sex? Probably she is just too shy and moans softly. Maybe she does not want to show you she actually enjoying it. Women are the most amazing creature, you have to spend a lifetime to really understand them.

Dead fish is a distinction of mindset and attitude more than physically being adventurous in bed.

If I am in bed with a woman who doesn't do much, just lie there for me to missionary her...but...as long as she "participates" in what we are doing...can be a few pelvic thrusts back at me...a quiet moan or two during...grunt or say which movement is good for her...let me know when she is cumming...if she does that, I would not put her on the dead fish list at all.

Sure, I would like a woman who is more active in bed, but perfect compatibility is very hard to come by...too much and I might think she is a nympho and I'm not satisfying her...too little and I may consider her a dead fish and she is not satisfying me....

Yet, must a woman understand a man (or vice versa) to have a reasonable sex life? Fuck NO...

All I ask for...and I think most bros are asking for, is that a sex partner at least acts like enjoying the sex....to show some enjoyment being with the person they declared to love and to hold, to cherish in sickness and in health and till death do they part blah blah blah....(or maybe they should add in the vow...except when he wants sex, then he is on his own...)

It is a real put off for guys when a woman just lies there, almost like waiting for the punishment to end...that is not a sex life, that is a torture chamber...

If pcc becomes more fulfilling than being with one's supposed soul mate...then the concept of soul mate is utter bullshit.

I mean for fuck sake...which bro here can fuck for 2,3,4 hours non stop? No? So is asking for half an hour of her day to enjoy each others body too much to ask for?? (I bet she spends more than half an hour everyday to beautify herself, for the pleasure of other people...but for her own husband, sorry, cannot spare half an hour...WTF??)
AND...we are not asking for everyday...just 2-3 times a week...that brings her investment down to less than 15 minutes a day...that one fewer nail polish or face scrub a day...

It is sad and I doubt it will ever be fully resolved...sexual compatibility is one area that is ever changing so cannot be pinned down fully...all we are asking is...please at least try...we're not asking the wives to fuck a stranger...it's with your husband, the one you chose and the one you vowed to love for the rest of your life...now, let's see some of that love, woman!!


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[Wizrd]

Originally Posted by Frankiestine

Bro I been asked this question many times and most of them are actually women who analysed my situation and throw me the same question. But honestly I know her too well what she dare to do and not. I guess I sort of know now I am in the wrong marriage cos when you got to start questioning it not once but many times then you probably know the answer. Like I said before, I painted myself into this corner and after having gone through a previous marriage, I have added several baggages with it...hence I cannot just walk away and leave everything...i can only put it down to karmaric effect of my follies and bite the bullet.......for the time being..

Bro, it is NEVER too late to make a different choice.

You may not be happy with the choices you have made, and you will not be fully happy with all the future choices you will make...but this is life bro...we can always make different choices.

I am not saying you should do this or that bro...but you must think seriously about what you want out of life...for now and for your future. We should not throw good money after bad money...likewise....we should not purposely make ourselves suffer for one wrong choice we made a few years ago...


Best of luck bro...find your happiness...

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[bernardlee]

Thank you Bro Wizrd! I managed to have sex with my wife finally.

It is the second sexual encounter in the last 5 years. Ya, it is very pathetic.

The plan of "telling my wife that I will be finding my own way to release myself outside" woke her up.

But after the ML (dead fish type), few days later she complained sick, blaming me that I am full of virus. WTF! I am good and healthy.

Not looking good now ... back to dry run again. Sian