Wife & Sex - going through the motion

[Canoneos]

For those bros that are not getting any action. Do your wifes have a job? I can tell you stress kills sex drive. If your wife stay at home, then there is no excuse. You should go and eat out.

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by Canoneos

For those bros that are not getting any action. Do your wifes have a job? I can tell you stress kills sex drive. If your wife stay at home, then there is no excuse. You should go and eat out.

Bro even if they stay at home they say too tire from all the house work....

Anyway from bro ferragmo list looks like i am in the poor category...some times worse 3 months once...

[sgiceboy]

Originally Posted by ferragamo

my scale is based on sex with wife:

2 or more times a week - very good
1 time a week - quite lucky already
2 time a month - average
1 time a month - fairly normal
1 time every 2 months - poor
1 time a year - better get divorced

for most guys , minimum need twice a week - that is a fair amount

but I think most guys are lucky to get twice a month

OMG..... like tat i already divorced many times liao.......

[SparkleDoll]

See some lucky ones here. Good for you all, enjoy it!

This dry episode with my husband has made me question my love and commitment to him. I know that even though he can't satisfy me now due to his stress, he will never agree to me finding my own satisfaction elsewhere. I am of thr view that monogamy is a choice. I was not really monogamous in previous r/s and only choose it when we got married to show my love for him and commitment to our partnership.

Now that he doesn't want sex, I'm miserable and grumpy on many days. And as I previously wrote, find it hard to stay faithful. This is just bringing me on a guilt trip with respect to marriage vows to stick to each other in good times or bad. Perhaps I have taken on more than I can chew.

Since my last post, we have had sex a grand ONE time. It was a quickie lasting all of 2mins with major persuasion on my part. Well at least it's something to start the new year with. 2minutes is better than none eh. Still trying to make our marriage work. If I leave now, there will only be one reason: sex or lack of it. Think we might still have a chance to work things out.

[5ag1_Boar]

Sparkle Doll, I'm divorced. I can tell one thing, if nothing else: You can't solve it all by yourself. Drag the man to marriage counsellor.

[sgjoey]

Originally Posted by SparkleDoll

...I am of thr view that monogamy is a choice. I was not really monogamous in previous r/s and only choose it when we got married to show my love for him and commitment to our partnership...

It may feel like a choice, but it is a "choice" that most of us were sold into because of the cultural conditioning that starts from the moment we are born. Think, for instance, of all the fairy tales when girl and boy finally marry and live happily ever after.

The power of the conditioning is such that even most of those who are non-monogamous will continue to pay lip service to the idea that monogamy is good, and they may suffer from guilty consciences every time they depart from the monogamy paradigm.

[Tomthefucker]

Originally Posted by ferragamo

my scale is based on sex with wife:

2 or more times a week - very good
1 time a week - quite lucky already
2 time a month - average
1 time a month - fairly normal
1 time every 2 months - poor
1 time a year - better get divorced

for most guys , minimum need twice a week - that is a fair amount

but I think most guys are lucky to get twice a month

sad to say, i am rapidly sliding down the scale to "fairly normal" one...

[auntygranny]

Originally Posted by ferragamo

my scale is based on sex with wife:

2 or more times a week - very good
1 time a week - quite lucky already
2 time a month - average
1 time a month - fairly normal
1 time every 2 months - poor
1 time a year - better get divorced

for most guys , minimum need twice a week - that is a fair amount

but I think most guys are lucky to get twice a month

Hmm... I have sex with my husband at least 3X a week, but each session is only about 20 mins. Still consider under the "very good" category?

I am married to him for coming 12 years. Sex with him is getting bored, I used it to show that I love him. : )

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by SparkleDoll

See some lucky ones here. Good for you all, enjoy it!

This dry episode with my husband has made me question my love and commitment to him.

Empathize with you sis....monster also living life mopping and grumpy...its a paradox, i know that i still love my oc yet i know i can't go on with a sexless marriage...i don't things has improved much since last year when she discover that i was actually settling it outside, i told her i was hoping that she would find out and make us question why things came to as such ...i had hope that this would buck her up and improve our sex life but apparently it did not...well it seems like i won't be able to hold out much longer...

[5ag1_Boar]

Originally Posted by auntygranny

Hmm... I have sex with my husband at least 3X a week, but each session is only about 20 mins. Still consider under the "very good" category?

I am married to him for coming 12 years. Sex with him is getting bored, I used it to show that I love him. : )

If only all spouses are like you. :-)

I have a gf and we love having sex a few times a week, but I do worry one day she'll find it boring, especiallyafter we marry and start staying together.

May I ask why you find sex boring now?
Is the anything that could make it more exciting?
As you do it to show your love, do you still get aroused and enjoy it?

[Stimsia]

Hi married guys I am ol and single w/o your privileges of normal or even fairly normal sex frequency haha

But I guess guys would want sex more than woman does
So what can guys do?

1) seek marriage / sex counselling
2) find fb / wl / FL

Put it this way, at least you have your own family, kids...family ties, togetherness during festive seasons, someones to come home to, bondings to treasure?

[Tsar]

When sex becomes a chore to one partner and its out of responsibility, it really becomes monotonous and non emotional at all. If it comes to a state of begging for it, its worse. I have friends that complains of this. My wife passed on before I got to this stage.

[Getzreal]

Originally Posted by SparkleDoll

See some lucky ones here. Good for you all, enjoy it!

This dry episode with my husband has made me question my love and commitment to him. I know that even though he can't satisfy me now due to his stress, he will never agree to me finding my own satisfaction elsewhere. I am of thr view that monogamy is a choice. I was not really monogamous in previous r/s and only choose it when we got married to show my love for him and commitment to our partnership.

Now that he doesn't want sex, I'm miserable and grumpy on many days. And as I previously wrote, find it hard to stay faithful. This is just bringing me on a guilt trip with respect to marriage vows to stick to each other in good times or bad. Perhaps I have taken on more than I can chew.

Since my last post, we have had sex a grand ONE time. It was a quickie lasting all of 2mins with major persuasion on my part. Well at least it's something to start the new year with. 2minutes is better than none eh. Still trying to make our marriage work. If I leave now, there will only be one reason: sex or lack of it. Think we might still have a chance to work things out.

Guess we hv e same scenario but we are of opp sex.

Had a long talk (sms actually) with her of the lack of sex thingy (our last was more than 6 mths ago). She finally agreed and wanna try to hv it whenever we feel like it.

After all these, I felt so errr...like a begger. Hv to beg to hv sex with wife? Isn't funny? So we had our 1st round of e yr. Everytime e same as per last time. Got a bit of foul play and I had to do all e job. When after 20 mins, she complained, "how come so long? Bery tired liao. Can you faster?"

My 'brudder' immediately retreated and told her I had cummed (showing her e faked satisfied face). Went to toilet and DIY. How nice for a start round of e year.

Thus, told myself, resign to fate and enjoy e companion of my Right Hand.

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by Stimsia

Hi married guys I am ol and single w/o your privileges of normal or even fairly normal sex frequency haha

But I guess guys would want sex more than woman does
So what can guys do?

1) seek marriage / sex counselling
2) find fb / wl / FL

Put it this way, at least you have your own family, kids...family ties, togetherness during festive seasons, someones to come home to, bondings to treasure?

Hi sis, I don't know if it is for a fact guys have a higher sex drive cos i do know of some ladies that needs it more then guys...

I always feel that humans are no different from animals, the only difference is we human has the power of discersion, where at least some of us... if we are deprived of food naturally we are forced to hunt for it...

As for bondings to treasure, that is a very subjective matter....how can there be bonding if there is no physical initmacy...everything is then a charade..

[auntygranny]

Originally Posted by 5ag1_Boar

If only all spouses are like you. :-)

I have a gf and we love having sex a few times a week, but I do worry one day she'll find it boring, especiallyafter we marry and start staying together.

May I ask why you find sex boring now?
Is the anything that could make it more exciting?
As you do it to show your love, do you still get aroused and enjoy it?

I have been with him for the past 15 years... Since I was about 19.

I know actually how he feels or what he is going to do next. I can even help him to continue his sentences! Having sex is more about seeking comfort than excitement. But I know he really love me very much.